ASMA HAMID

an offline journal from Mami It has been a while. Gone through countless number of quizzes, MPP meetings, raya holiday, raya celebration, mid semester exams, mid semester break (where I went to Cameron with my family and had a whole load of peaceful fun!) and now I only have one and a half semester left until UniKL!  I told myself I would blog every day. Didn't happen. Who would've thought that life in college would be this busy. Or is it because I keep on keeping myself busy?  Life in college has been tough. Messing. But I miss home. There's really nothing fun to do here. If I'm not doing my assignments or studying, I'd be trying to sleep or sleeping. It's the same thing over and over again. But if there's one thing I look forward to while being here, it'd be going home. The Raya Haji holiday is coming soon... I honestly could not wait. But after that I'd be buried in books for the finals. 4 FLAT I'm liking my roommates. Hannah ...

itsabreeze Something I hate, something I really really hate. Sellers who increase the price of the items they are selling after all the preorders have closed. That's what you call bullshitting your customers. You tell them that something is RM130 w/o postage at first while another shop is selling it for RM138 with postage so knowing that I'll buy two, ofcourse I ordered with the first shop. However, she suddenly messaged me saying that the price from the supplier is actually RM145 w/o postage after all the shops have closed their preorders. That's like RM15 difference. WHY? I pledge that I will never ever cheat my customers and make them feel how I am feeling right now when/if I become a business woman.

Have you ever disrespected a teacher that have taught you before? Have you ever chatted bad about a teacher that have taught you before? I have but I've reflected on myself and I've apologised. But never in my life have I ever said stuff like "Cikgu tu bodoh", "That teacher is dumb" or "The teacher's daft". But just recently, today actually, I heard a story from a friend of mine that a junior asked her "Macam mana kau boleh dengar dekat cikgu bodoh tu?" while an English teacher was telling her something. If this kid was good in English, I wouldn't mind but I can tell you that the kid probably couldn't even introduce her/himself in English without making a grammatical error. I don't want to see the kid succeed, I don't even think she/he can anyway. Not with an attitude like that.  SPM starts in 17 days. 

Some Malaysians are lucky to have the chance to grow up overseas. Growing up overseas exposes us to so many different cultures and religions (especially if you're living in Cheetham Hill!). Back where I used to live, I had 3 best classmates. An English, an Indian and a Libyan. So I communicated daily with people of different races. Thinking back, there were never really any problem about racism in school except this one time when a dark skinned kid called a dark skinned teacher a ' nigger ' but that was it.  To say that there were many racism problems out of school would be a bit ... because at the place I used to live, it doesn't matter what race you are or who you are, if you pick a fight, shit will happen. The Pakistanis fought with the English, the English fought with the English, the Pakistanis fought with the Pakistanis, the mixed group fought with the mixed group. It's all the same. But what I see in Malaysia is this culture (I don't know...

From proudduck.com I get jealous of people who can go to any random shop and just get anything they want because they can fit in them. I want to wear nice clothes too. I want to look nice too. I want to be thin too. I want to wear heels too. I want to wear cute dresses and jeans too. I want to wear really nice scarves too. I want to have those fashion blogs too. Don't you?

Noreul joahae I don't know what I'm doing with my life. I can no longer see my future. I don't know what I'll be 10 years from now. I can't see where I'll be 10 years from now. I am lost and I can't find my way out. Everything I do now is a waste of time. Doing this is a waste of time. Sleeping is a waste of time. Thinking is a waste of time. The only thing that isn't is memorizing. All I need to do now is memorize everything that is in my Form 4 and Form 5 text books. That is all there is to it now but even if I do that, I still don't know what is waiting for me in the future.

You don't get it. I feel sad when I see my friends bring their packed lunches to school because no one would make me any at home. I feel sad when I go to school and I feel hungry cos no one made breakfast for me. I feel sad that I wouldn't be able to eat lunch unless Papa buys em or unless I make them myself. I feel sad everytime you tell me to jaga Muaz and then tell me to study. I feel sad when you ask me to follow you out when I have so many things to study for. I feel sad that you want me to get straight As but you never help. I feel sad that I don't get as much attention as I used to get. I feel sad when you canceled our holiday without thinking about when's our next chance to have the holiday. I feel sad everytime you marah me just because I'm angry. You don't know how lonely I feel when I'm at home. You just don't get it.

NEO EOBSI IJE NAN EOTTEOKE SARA Why do you like to kacau me? Huh? What did I do to you? Huh? Macam cacat je marah blog. LOL. So you see, today was fun. School was fun. I don't know if it's because of Sejarah, Breaktime >< or English. But something today made it fun. I wish everyday in the future would be like today. Life would be nice. I think I'm going to Penang this weekend. I'm always going on last minute planned trips. Oh. I applied for PRS. I have to go for an interview but I dont know when. Have I posted this already? Sorry if I did. lol.

NAEGA JEIL JAL NAGA Dumdidum. My bracelets dah sampai. I'm like celebrating. Well not really. I have like 25 things to do on my to-do-list like what the. I'm getting tired of life. Seriously. Eh wait, I'm getting tired of myself. Yeah, so tired of myself. Ramadhan is coming soon. I can't wait to be honest. I don't even like Eid... cos I have never had fun during Eid. Cos then memories on how I used to celebrate in Manchester comes rushing back. Cos Eid over there beats Eid in Malaysia except for the fact that we don't have our families (Mak, Mak Tok, Pak Tok, Pak Ngah, Busu and etc). England isn't even a muslim country and we had an Eid party in school. Jangan harap nak ada dekat Malaysia. Stuff like that. Plus, my brother and my sister would only be home for a bit. My best friends would only be home for a while. I'll be some kind of loner but then I'll have my mum, my dad and Muaz. But nothing will ever be complete again. And the...

WHY, WHY WHY. but you're not even mine. mwohya. -.-' yu. why yu so gedik with him lah? yu perasan perasan all like sheet. piss me off. im angry liao. yu like him, meh? so obvious, dun make not obvious can ah? but yu so manja with every1. i wan say i jealous. but yu wuld noe im jealous d. he so nice to yu. but i tink bcoz yu manja-manja wit him. but he nice. he so mean to me, he can not not be min to me ah? :'( Nicklaus insulted me today. He said ''Asma, don't be defend next time, you suck at defending.'' like what the. Kay fine, I'm not good but then I didn't have any help. Macam sedih gila. I don't even know how I actually played tadi during koko. Gila terasa kot. tadi B (the team im in) won the netball competition. macamawesome.

GET DOWN DOWN DOWN I have Chem next week on Monday. When I say 'Chem' people think that I said 'Kem' because the pronunciation is basically the same. What should I say then? Chemist? Chemist are people who are in the Chemistry stream. Cos you know, Chemistry has its on stream that we can dip our feet in. Get it get it get it get it get it on. I'm sleepy. I'm gonna make a ringtone from a BLOHCK B (korean tongue) . WANNA B. WANNA B. WE DO IT DO IT DO IT NOW. this is bbom bom bom.

FOLLOW ME, FOLLOW ME. I mizz my sister and my brother. O0. I can't wait for the exams to finish.. even though it hasn't started. And since we're not going to Saudi Arabia. Can we please go somewhere overseas? Like like... Hong Kong! I wanna go to Sino centre and buy all the cheap stuff they have there... or or somewhere where it is winter. That'd be so fun. JEBAL? JEBAL? JEBAL? nemind. I can't wait for the project I'm doing to be finished so that I wouldn't have to worry about it anymore. I mean, all people know is that they have to sit in front of the camera and talk. What they don't know is that I have to watch video by video and take out unnecessary stuff and then I have to edit it. I also have to compile and combine them together. That's what they don't know. I mean, all they do is go in front of the camera and go ''OMG, malu lahhh, I'll do it later lah'' and they're like ''Nevermind, I'll do o...

AND I LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU Looking back at what you guys just did, I feel like laughing. I did the same thing to somebody else 2 years back. Sorry but I don't get jealous of people that have things that I don't want. You guys failed. Think about it and feel embarrassed, think about it and feel ashamed, I'll just sit here and watch. I'm not mad or anything but it's kind of annoying that you guys actually would think that I would be bothered. And you! You piss me off. So bad. Don't take my peepz man, it ain't cool. I mean, you came, dropping by and you steal the spotlight. I'll be honest, I never had the 'spotlight' on me but people appreciated me and all but since you came, everything got all messed up. They're suppose to talk to me, not you. You're an unthankful something aswell. A pain in my ass. You want somin, you get it, then you ignore it. It's called jual mahal. I'm gonna laugh at you when you lose that somet...

GEUREURITJI MOTAESO APAHANAYO I miss living without caring about anything. I like it when I don't have homework to think about. I miss locking myself in the store room after getting told off. I like it when I could do anything and everything without thinking what would happen afterwards. I miss being young. Tipu best kan? Nak jaga hati orang kan? Kena lah tipu kan? Heh. Heh. Heh. I'm going for Koko tomorrow and I'm going to McD straight after that and then I'm going back to Johor. So I have to pack tonight. I'm tired I'm tired I'm tired I'm tired I'm tired I'm tired I'm tired I'm tired I'm tired Kenapa perlu jerit-jerit? Kalau sehari tak jerit tak sah ke? Macam annoying kot. Sakit telinga. I might even get high blood pressure. I'm tired of people taking me for granted. Tired of thinking that people are talking about me behind my back. Tired of people acting so nice to me for a ...

DA GEOJITMAL The moment when no one's on your side and you start crying. The moment when no one would cover your wrongs just to protect you and you start crying. The moment when everyone disses you and there's nobody there standing up for and you start crying. The moment when everyone wish that you would die, there's nobody there saying that they want you to stay alive and you start crying. The moment when you wish you could say sorry but there's no use and you start crying. That is the worst moment in everyone's life. But then there will always be that one person that stands by the side and doesn't do anything and at times like this, you just wish that they would speak up and stick up for you. But they won't, ever. I just went through it, a second ago and I started crying. I miss Nina, I miss Munirah, I miss Nurul, I miss Iman, I miss Farhana, I miss Hana, I miss Ana, I miss Kak Atin. No one's ever there for me anymore. I mean, in...